So I happen to be lying around doing nothing? Oh, i'm going to get charged for that! (Charged mean going to detention barracks aka military jail) But hey, the kind of 'job' i'm being employed for, and being paid for a meagre sum of $450 justifies it all. I'm trying hard now not to get promoted to corporal, as that would mean half a year more of military life for me. But that will never happen. My education levels pre-determines my corporal rank. And should i console myself that I would get a pay rise for that promotion? Well no...
I don't fancy the 1 bar(officer rank) or the 3 stripes(3rd sergeant) rank, and I don't see why so many people want to put themselves through this sheer torture. Some say it's because of the prestige, and I might agree tentatively; but for those who say they want the rank for the money, that's PURE stupidity. A 3rd sergeant's pay is around $550-750? and the price of that is receiving the avalanche of sai kang (shit work in hokkien) from the high-ranking officers above you. I've said many times probably, that I could earn even much more than a sergeant if I were given time to work outside, and not having to go through the pain, blood, and sweat and at the end of it all, collect your small sum of allowance.
Money makes the world go round. They bribe us blatantly. I don't suppose anyone of us would be motivated to get a gold/silver for IPPT if not for the money involved, and it is a rather substantial amount ($200 for gold, $100 for silver). No, again I donot harbour any thoughts of getting a gold just because of the monetary award that come with training (though i got silver with minimal training). Or perhaps $200 is not a large sum of money for me to even consider working for it. I can never understand those psychotic people who feel the need to dispel the stresses of their mundane military life existence by jumping out of planes or canoeing down rapids on weekends. Releasing stress they say. Seems silly to me to be relieving stress by replacing it with terror.
And me? I rather lie down in one corner, contented with only a book in my hand, and an awaiting cold latte to touch up the simple atmosphere. I don't request for exquisite treatments such as a health beauty spa nor a zen-like house of tranquility with the smell of rosemary aromatherapy permeating the complex. All i ask for are LONG WEEKENDS! But then again, you might have heard me talking about a bathtub fantasy, where I imagine myself indulging in a bathtub filled with aromatic flower petals, sipping wine and eating strawberries and cherries. And of course, not to forget the lush sounds of music playing seamlessly in the background. This again is completed with a book! But that afterall is only a fantasy, and I'm never going to do that, as I think it's mad right?
This life is non-conducive for writing, not until now, where I finally get to be in contact with computers everyday. My precious blog was deleted previously due to neglience, and I owe that to them for siphoning off my creative juices during the weekdays, and before I can recharge again in the weekends, I'm happily trotting back into camp. No, I should blame myself for turning life down. But really, what can I write about? I don't think I would like to recollect what I am doing in BMT, it is only reinforcing the horrors that occured during the week, and I don't want to conclude the tramautic past off by writing, archiving it down in black and white. Do I need to be reminded of the harsh history? No.
I only had 2 interesting writing encounters, and both happened to be my instructors appraisal during BMT, and at SMM; If I received a penny for every derogatory term I used on them, I would have been a rich man by now.
As bad as all this might sound, still, all this can be summed up as a valuable lesson; it proved to me conclusively that the best way to live this life is to accept and adapt. Extreme emotions that never existed in the past. Simple happiness feels like immense euphoria; Sadness stirs like licking flames on a claypot - whipping, torturous, unrelentless.
Sometimes, I wonder if I should be grateful? or should I remain indignant?
I don't fancy the 1 bar(officer rank) or the 3 stripes(3rd sergeant) rank, and I don't see why so many people want to put themselves through this sheer torture. Some say it's because of the prestige, and I might agree tentatively; but for those who say they want the rank for the money, that's PURE stupidity. A 3rd sergeant's pay is around $550-750? and the price of that is receiving the avalanche of sai kang (shit work in hokkien) from the high-ranking officers above you. I've said many times probably, that I could earn even much more than a sergeant if I were given time to work outside, and not having to go through the pain, blood, and sweat and at the end of it all, collect your small sum of allowance.
Money makes the world go round. They bribe us blatantly. I don't suppose anyone of us would be motivated to get a gold/silver for IPPT if not for the money involved, and it is a rather substantial amount ($200 for gold, $100 for silver). No, again I donot harbour any thoughts of getting a gold just because of the monetary award that come with training (though i got silver with minimal training). Or perhaps $200 is not a large sum of money for me to even consider working for it. I can never understand those psychotic people who feel the need to dispel the stresses of their mundane military life existence by jumping out of planes or canoeing down rapids on weekends. Releasing stress they say. Seems silly to me to be relieving stress by replacing it with terror.
And me? I rather lie down in one corner, contented with only a book in my hand, and an awaiting cold latte to touch up the simple atmosphere. I don't request for exquisite treatments such as a health beauty spa nor a zen-like house of tranquility with the smell of rosemary aromatherapy permeating the complex. All i ask for are LONG WEEKENDS! But then again, you might have heard me talking about a bathtub fantasy, where I imagine myself indulging in a bathtub filled with aromatic flower petals, sipping wine and eating strawberries and cherries. And of course, not to forget the lush sounds of music playing seamlessly in the background. This again is completed with a book! But that afterall is only a fantasy, and I'm never going to do that, as I think it's mad right?
This life is non-conducive for writing, not until now, where I finally get to be in contact with computers everyday. My precious blog was deleted previously due to neglience, and I owe that to them for siphoning off my creative juices during the weekdays, and before I can recharge again in the weekends, I'm happily trotting back into camp. No, I should blame myself for turning life down. But really, what can I write about? I don't think I would like to recollect what I am doing in BMT, it is only reinforcing the horrors that occured during the week, and I don't want to conclude the tramautic past off by writing, archiving it down in black and white. Do I need to be reminded of the harsh history? No.
I only had 2 interesting writing encounters, and both happened to be my instructors appraisal during BMT, and at SMM; If I received a penny for every derogatory term I used on them, I would have been a rich man by now.
As bad as all this might sound, still, all this can be summed up as a valuable lesson; it proved to me conclusively that the best way to live this life is to accept and adapt. Extreme emotions that never existed in the past. Simple happiness feels like immense euphoria; Sadness stirs like licking flames on a claypot - whipping, torturous, unrelentless.
Sometimes, I wonder if I should be grateful? or should I remain indignant?
posted by Christopher | 5:52 PM
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